Children, Alien Beings

How on earth do children end up so different from us parents? Of my four kids, one seems sorta like me emotionally and physically.  The others are aliens, I think. 

My kids have confidence, charisma, and are darn cute...handsome/pretty even. As a child, I was shy and awkward, with mouse brown hair and was way too skinny. Really, as an adult I am the same, except now I am a bit too plump.

Thankfully, though, I finally have confidence.  It took a number of years, but now I feel just fine in my skin...I just don't seem to be able to be taken very seriously when in a group.  I tend to say odd things...and then I just naturally turn to odd humor, usually with an English-type of twist.

So, anyways, I am grateful for my alien children.  And, of course, the one sort of like me. They seem OK. And I seem OK.

All is well.  :)

Stewardship and getting stomped on as a family

My son, the one that is argumentative, assertive, and loveable... got the only 100% on a recent essay in his religion class. He was asked to read it aloud. The essay was on stewardship, and it had specific areas it had to contain. Basically it asked about the whys and hows of stewardship of God's creation. Then it asked how his family was contributing to the principle.

I am very proud of him. My son is inconsistent with his grades. He is capable of high A's (and his teachers remind us of this every reporting period), but he is 14. I figure he will get the grades he should next year, when his high school records start.

But, what makes me the happiest, is that he was able to convey a key principle of our family in essay form. Our family believes that showing love to all of God's creation, is the perfect reflection of our perfect God. Our raising of happy, free-range chickens, using glass milk/orange juice bottles, recycling, etc., are areas where we staunchly act in praising God's creation.

But, what his essay did not say...

Our family is very trusting. And we pay for this trust way too often.  When we feel that there is someone in need, we give all that we can emotionally and physically. This is the essence of love.  But we are coming to realize that those who distrust easily....are also willing to hurt others easily. 

I am trying to come to grips with the sadness I have endured recently with another family that our family gave our hearts to.  When I am hurt deeply, I fight with myself not to hate the people that have hurt me.  How do I show compassion? I can SHOW compassion, and I do...but how do I FEEL compassion?

Dunno.

Evangelism vs. Charity

I found out that I somehow evangelized to an acquaintance of mine. Let me be clear: I DO NOT evangelize.  I grew up as an Episcopal.  We are silent and intellectual about our faith.  I converted to the Roman Catholic faith after a long journey with my husband, and some amazing mentors.

So today, this lovely woman told me that she had come back to the Catholic Church after she talked to me about my conversion.  She had wondered what I was converting to?  As she began to teach her own children a faith, she realized that she needed to go back home to her Catholic faith. Very interesting, as I didn't try to convince her of anything...I just told my story.

I am glad this family has found a religious home. This is a good thing...my religion gives me strength and comfort.  If only every one in this world could have the same sense of strength.  My strength also comes from the intense feeling of love from God and a love for God's creation (people, animals, plants, environment!)  I must thank my dad for this, I think.

BUT...my life is actually about the idea of what we are told at the very END of our church service: Go in peace to love and serve the Lord AND ONE ANOTHER.  This isn't empty religion.  This is about making a difference in the world.  Take care of your family, take care of your environment, and do some act of kindness to someone every day.  And, when you can, volunteer to help other people in need. 

I will be seeing this woman tomorrow.  She has asked me to talk to her about what I know about homeschooling.  I am not the expert, but I have my own experience that I am willing to share. 

"Charity may be a very short word, but with its tremendous meaning of pure love, it sums up man's entire relation to God and to his neighbor." -- St Aelred of Rievaulx

Inwardly I am rolling my eyes

There are an amazing number of opinions in this world. I enjoy delving into the conglomeration of ideas I think strange, perceptions I would never have thought of and yes...notions that strike me as dead-on correct. 

But, I do not find it charming when strangers who just happen to be stuck sitting across from me in the dance waiting room for an hour, think I must want to hear their opinionated ideas. I start to feel crazy about their lack of reason -- even when I DO agree with them! I do not argue, just merely change the subject in the most polite manner I can.  But inside, I am shaking my head and wondering if there will ever be a society that can understand when to debate and when to just talk about the weather. I was quite a debater in high school...but really, spewers don't care about reasonable discourse.  

I guess I have finally started to accept this fact.  

Dear Lord, Thank you for finally giving me the ability in public to hold my tongue. (except on this blog)...um, would it be possible to give me this ability with my close friends and family too?

My brain never shuts off.

Good children...

 Since Friday, I have had three different people tell me (one called me on the phone just for this reason) that my kids are very good.  I was told that my kids are well-behaved, respectful, and nice.  

The fact that people seem to seek me (and my beloved hubby) out to tell us this, leads me to believe that perhaps we are, sadly, unusual.  We have taught them to be these qualities since they were tiny.  Of course, in public they tend to show their angelic sides and so the bickering and rambunctiousness at home doesn't get seen by the "outside".  Nonetheless, I would have to say, my kids are darn nice, as people go. 

But the problem lies in this:  These comments about them are usually told to me within hearing range of my kids.  Sounds like a good way to encourage kids to continue being good?  Well, yes, except what about the naughty kids that are all around them in the supermarket, church, dance class... don't get more than a hush to their disruptions.   My kids did at  lovely job alter-serving at today's mass.  The only issue was a child who refused to kneel at the right time,  swung his rope into other alter servers, and not paying attention to what needed to be done. It only takes one child who is disruptive to cause the other "good" kids to want to see the problem fixed, or change to nature of the kids.  If one child s allowed to be hostile,  apathetic, or any other negative actions... it will influence "how good" my kids could possibly become.
So the Elelphantt in the room, is the naughty chidren are therre.  Causeing distress to my well-behaving kids.  Are my kids supposed to give peer pressure on the kids to correct their behaviour?  Then my kids get the brunt
I think probably parents, grandparents, deacons, priests, and other parishioners might think about saying something helpful to parents overseeing the harder kids.  There are no rule books....but honest folk who can ask a kind question.

New Year's Eve at the Zoo

"Dear God, thank you for the foresight to keep feeling from my feet."
Love,
The Ducks